Getting Naked: Would You Become Less to Become More?

You know the saying "Being a big fish in a small pond"? I do hope you are feeling like a big fish in your life, because we all are meant to be big fishes. I'm a HUGE WHALE for my son and hopefully a big fish for my family. I do enjoy a big fish syndrome in some other areas of my life as well.

But here's the thing -- you shouldn't feel like a big fish in all the areas of your life. That just shows that your pond has started to limit you and it's getting critical to raise your standards or wave goodbye to a fulfilled life.

It might be a good time to see if your perception of yourself is really honest or is it just reflecting the limiting expectations that "your pond" is setting to you.

Before leaving to Malaysia I was enjoying a rather comfortable life in Estonia, had a rather strong self-image and even though I was challenging my comfort-zone regularly it never got to a critical point where my self-image would have got seriously challenged.

See -- Estonia is amazing, but it's tiny, tiny, tiny, almost an non-existing piece of land compared to the rest of the world. And though I love that piece dearly I also know that the standards here are different. It's easy to be big in a small pond, but when you take yourself out of this pond you get a very different perspective on yourself. You're suddenly so much less and at the same time your potential becomes so much bigger.

Who I was outside of Estonia was a girl from Estonia, much of what I had achieved here didn't matter at all. I was in different roles and learned about all of those roles, but when I faced the mirror I realized that none of these roles was even close to my inner potential.

That's a scary and one of the most exciting thoughts at the same time. Scary because it compromises my identity, it's admitting to myself that what I thought was great about me is just a work in progress and who I thought I was wasn't other than the reflection of the expectations on me.



Estonia had limited me with a certain image of myself, something I considered good enough, even great in many aspects. Yet it wasn't the true me, it was the perspective that others had on me and that I took over as the truth.

Asking Myself Some Tough Questions

I think young people are often more successful in their minds than in reality. Nothing wrong with a strong self-image, but I believe that the real strength lies in the ability to see your weaknesses and feel empowered by learning. A simple "I don't know how, but I want to learn" is a powerful statement.

Now here comes the exciting part. With the honesty and focus I feel in charge of my life and results. I love this person that I am, what I've learned and done so far, but I'm more aware of where I'm standing in my development. It takes work, humility and understanding of yourself to get to the next level.

Might be time to reflect on some questions:

• Who is setting your bar? Who are you comparing yourself to? Are you surrounding yourself with truly amazing people, books and ideas or do you settle the bar someone less ambitious has set you?
• Which out of your past achievements really make you proud and which -- even if others consider significant -- leave you cold? What is real and what is an empty concept that needs to be refilled?
• Who around you is doing something better that you want to be doing?
• What are these people doing differently, who are more successful than you in the area you want to succeed?

All in all -- are you willing to exchange your current identity to a less accomplished, yet more focused and honest version of yourself?

But if this identity that you're holding about yourself isn't your inner truth, but the version that others have told you, then you're not really losing anything. But you're gaining an amazing awareness of where you are standing and where you want to go.

I mean -- what about letting go of this old self image that's just holding you back to be truly happy and to be doing the things you really desire? Even though it means losing your public face. Well grounded and accomplished people will see you through anyway, so for whom are you putting up the show?

So this one is for the honesty when facing the mirror and the truthful journey towards your real potential.